Your downs

Whatever that is holding you down right now, lock it down in a box. Feel it. But don't let them control the situations, you have to live this very moment first and then worry about the future. No one knows, if there is going to be another sunrise for you tomorrow. The only thing which you have and you own is, NOW. So try not to feel down, because of the thoughts that you have in mind. Make every moment worth it. Your body is out of shape, that is okay. You are having any physical problems, that's okay. Your life is a mess right now, that's okay. Let’s look on the brighter side. Let’s celebrate on what you have now rather than looking on all the things you are losing out on. Not many get a life to live as a human being, be grateful for it and live to the fullest. I know, it's hard. But I know you can do it. I can do it. Everyone can do it, once they decide to do it. Here is a poem from a movie I watched recently. I hope it boosts you up. 

So live your life that the fear of death can never enter your heart. Trouble no one about their religion; respect others in their view, and demand that they respect yours. Love your life, perfect your life, beautify all things in your life. Seek to make your life long and its purpose in the service of your people. Prepare a noble death song for the day when you go over the great divide.

Always give a word or a sign of salute when meeting or passing a friend, even a stranger, when in a lonely place. Show respect to all people and grovel to none.

When you arise in the morning give thanks for the food and for the joy of living. If you see no reason for giving thanks, the fault lies only in yourself. Abuse no one and no thing, for abuse turns the wise ones to fools and robs the spirit of its vision.

When it comes your time to die, be not like those whose hearts are filled with the fear of death, so that when their time comes they weep and pray for a little more time to live their lives over again in a different way. Sing your death song and die like a hero going home.

~ Chief Tecumseh 

Merry Christmas

Christmas has always been very close to my heart. The reason, one, I grew up going to a Christian school. Every year there used to be a big fat Christmas celebration. I loved it. The part which I loved the most was, we were asked to bring old clothes, potatoes, rice or wheat, in any amount we wish. Even if we didn't bring anything that was okay. But most of us, used to bring some or the other thing. All of this would then be collected by a teacher and it would then be distributed to the poor and the homeless on the Christmas eve. It was magical seeing there faces bloom with happiness.

The second reason, why Christmas is close to my heart is because, it falls in the month of December and December is my favourite month. I don't know if anyone really dislikes December. 

Even if you belong to a different religion. Even if you believe in a different religion. Let's just take this festival on a lighter note. Let's celebrate. Be with your friends and family. Get your loved ones closer to you. Don't just get drunk and pass away. Enjoy the day and take care of yourself. 

Relationship changes you..

I have been in a relationship. A long, stable, loving, happy relationship. It has ended, for good. I don't know about the future but the things I've done, the things I've experienced while I was in a relationship were both painful, which I would never like to experience again and beautiful, totall bliss at times. Things do happen in a relationship. You understand the other person so deeply and precisely. Every day you go closer to the other person, you experience all the curves and edges of that person and it reciprocates. Relationship changes you, it makes you mature. It makes you understand what the opposite sex is all about. 

Earlier you were sweet, gentle, Innocent, because you didn't knew the truth. But once it comes to you, you change. You no more care about what people think about your relationship, you care more about what you and your partner thinks about the relationship. You know, actions speak louder than words now. You love the other person, and that shows by the way you behave with them, how you keep them, how you hold them, how you talk to them, how you treat them as a whole. Talks don't do the work, actions do. This is one of the many aspects that you discover when you're in a deep relationship with someone. This changes you totally, from in and out.

I want to give myself a block to recover from this. I want to reverse all of it. I want to be the same me, who didn't knew the answer to the questions, who was gentle and was still in a discovering process. I don't want to mature. I don't want to think to a level that it starts paining, me and only me. I want to be full of innocence again. 

A letter to my younger self..

Hie,

      I won't be telling you who I am or anything else about me, all I can tell you is, please continue reading as this may change how you feel about things, and change you completely as a whole. And may be, just may be, I may never exist. But only if you pay attention to the things that I've written here, and you choose to change from now onwards. So my dear, here it goes.

1) You're young. Soft. Gentle. Don't really want to hurt anybody. Scared sometimes to what may come up with a wrong action of yours. You're carefull. Sometimes you care more than you need to. It hurts, but you don't show it to anyone. I want you to change. Change for better. Don't get scared by people who behave to be stronger than you are, it isn't that you were bullied anytime. Just that you don't speak up. Follow, when you don't feel like doing it. Don't do that, it will harm only and only you. Fight if needed. It will pain. It will be uncomfortable. But it's okay my dear. 

2) It's totally okay to not have friends for a while. Don't worry if people don't accompany you when you want them too. You need to learn that not eveyrone will like you. That's fine. You need to learn to live alone and take pride in that. 

3) Never show a hint of innocence on your face, for they take this as a sign of your weakness. Weak, which you aren't. You're strong. Tough as a rock. Ready to face anything and everything which is thrown upon you. So be that, show them what you are. You are different, meant for something different. Be that. Do that.

4) Don't think about what other people think about you. I know you do that a lot, everyday, anytime you're free. You're on it and so worried about it. Like I said, not everybody's gonna like you ever. There will be lovers, there will be haters, there will be friends, there will different kinds of people everytime. They will have all the different opnions about you. But what matters is my friend, whether you take them into your head. Be it goood. Be it bad. Never take their opinions up to your head. That will make you sick and I know you never want to be that.

4) It's okay if you loose. It's okay if you fail. It's a blessing in disguise. Only if you fail, you will learn and trust me failures will take you places where winning never can. It will make you stronger, smarter and a better person if you choose to stand up everytime you fail. Which you've done everytime, just keep doing it without any hesitations or any second thoughts. Because that's the best you can do. 

5) Family is first. That being said not everything they say is right. Don't take their opinions up to your head. They say because they feel like that. That doesn't mean you're like that. They may have a different perspective, but it never can define who you are. So please don't get upset, when they something harsh or uncomfortable to you. Don't cry. It's alright. You have to be strong. Face it, because, I promise, better things wait for you. Things you would've never imagined. 

6) Work hard. I know you do, to the best of your ability, but do some more. It will benefit you and only you. 

7) Look at yourself and only yourself. Don't compare yourself with someone else. You're different. If someone has better things and knowledge than you, that it no ways decreases your self worth. Given the situation and time, anyone can succeed. Understand this and look at yourself and work harder to be a better version of yourself everyday.

8) Do crazy things. Don't be afraid. It's okay if you get bruises or broken legs. But never ignore what your heart says to you, like you always had. Brain is a fucked up place. If you can escape from that place, even for a while, do that.

9) Lastly, people do think about you. People do care about you. Don't feel so down when people don't respond to you or be a littler harsher on you. You're sensitive you know that, they don't. But that doesn't mean, they don't care about you. They do, just that they're being a version of themselves. You don't need anyones justification. You're awesome. You're amazing. You're a badass. Realize that. Fuck the world. Respect all. Fear none.

Recalling

Whenever I visit any new place or head for a new experience I've done this one thing which has helped me a lot to recall back all the memories. I listen to a particular song through out the journey or at times 2 to 3 songs is all I have to listen to, while I'm in such a situation. I visited Kerala few months back. Beautiful place to visit. Luckily I left Mumbai when the monsoons were about to hit God's own country. So as soon as I reached there, within two to three days it started raining moderately. It was a road trip actually with my friends dad and some of the mutuals that I know. So throughout the trip I listened to these three songs.
1) Linking Park - Waiting for the End
2) When chai meets toast - Firefly
3) When chai meets toast - Joy of little things
4) Justin Beiber - Company
5) Epic Soul Factory - Everdream
 All of them are my favourites in some or the other way. The trip was amazing with such good music always buzzing around my ears. The thing that hits me now is your brain has an ability to recall a memory when you listen to the song which you would've listened to, while making that memory. It's amazing. All of these songs when I listen to it now. Brings back all the memories. Precisely. Clearly. Total bliss when such things hit you